after an exciting week of causing my relationship go on the edge of the cliff, getting teeth removed from my mouth causing me to be in pain and not eat the not-so-much-needed calories, i was able to sit back and relax with my boy and watch tv and movies. i realized that even after everything we have gone through and having everything happen and having my doubts and worries and moments of weakness, i do love him. i love everything about him, even his weirdness and his super nerdyness. i left him reluctantly tonight not wanting to let him return home. it seemed like the night slipped through my fingers just as fast as sand. but we parted ways and i wanted to be with him again. i look forward to seeing him again.

contentness is not really here but it is on the horizon. its coming with the rising sun.