do hard things

I just finished another book, given to me by joey. it was really good. it was called "Do Hard Things" by Alex&Brett Harris. they are younger brothers to the guy who wrote "I kissed dating goodbye" and extremely amazing authors. They wrote to teenagers talking about how sometimes life just makes us think that we should be doing the norm, which isn't that hard for us...and we are called to a higher calling. we are called to do hard things. some things may be harder for others. like mine would be sticking a relationship out...or liking someone before judging them...or accepting people for who they are. others it might be to read the Bible more, or to head up a campaign when they are super shy. it is all relative to the person.

i did find some things that were quote worthy...not a lot. it was more of a book that made me think then a book i wanted to quote.

"God set His standards this high so that we won't make the mistake of aiming low. He made them unreachable so that we would never have excuse to stop growing" Page 101

"It's possible to be so concerned with what has happened in the past or so caught up in what's happening in the present, that we pay no attention to what God has for us next." Page 191.

it was an extremely good book. there was no hard words, but it made you think if you are giving your very best to how you live your life. am i giving my very best to school, even if it comes easy...why am i settling for the easy when I could be going beyond what people expect of me. am i trying hard enough in my life to make a difference or do I settle for being mediocre?

www.therebelution.com

reality vs dreams

how am i supposed to sleep at night when my reality for the past few days has been better then any dream i could come up with?

my life hasn't been perfect, and i know that things won't always be perfect....but when i have days like this, i feel like i can conquer the world, i fear nothing, and nothing can hurt me. but i know to not set myself up too high because when things go wrong, then i come crashing even farther.

i got to spend the night with someone i love. someone i care about. though i couldn't fall asleep very well, it was still worth it. it was worth being able to roll over in the morning and smile at him and look at his face. and kiss him with his bad morning breath. (and mine too).

but i know that im trying to soak up as much time as i can in the next few weeks because he will be gone from me. and im more determined after the past few days to make things work. i feel like this is someone God has placed in my life for a reason. God has allowed my heart to open up to him for a reason.

i feel like for once, something is going the way i want it to. it isn't because of anyone else. its something i have wanted, worked at, and got. i feel like this is meant to be something amazing....even if its for a little while. which i hope its not. i hope this lasts longer then a little while. i want to make sure it does.

A month

A month left. I have 3 fridays left. just 3 short weeks before he is gone. 5 fridays till I am moving away from this town. I have to stretch the next month out as long as possible. I can't believe that life has come to this point so fast. I feel like I need more time. I want more time here, to go back to be with friends I know, and have grown to love. I don't want new ones. I don't want to learn new faces, new personalities, new surroundings.......

yet my mind is ready. my mind is excited for the new experiences. I am ready to be out of this heat, and out of this house that has become my prison, holding all the memories of hurt and anguish against me. the walls haunt me with nightmares reaching out to hold me back from moving forward.

I am thankful for the people i have met, the experiences that i have gone through, the schools and teachers i have gone through. I am thankful for the roof over my head that has sheltered me from so many storms, the best friends that have stood beside me and carried me when i felt like drowning in my own tears.

i carry your heart with me

i carry your heart with me(i carry it in

my heart)i am never without it(anywhere

i go you go,my dear; and whatever is done

by only me is your doing,my darling)

i fear

no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want

no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)

and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant

and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows

(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud

and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows

higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)

and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)

Edward Estlin Cummings

heard this poem on a movie...and loved it. :)